Bob’s World

My life revolves around the computer. I use lots of software - LOTS. I’m at the computer waaaaayyyyyy too much (just ask my family). Now, I’m not the world’s most prolific computer user ever invented, but I’m in the top 50% of people that actually read documentation and actually try things on my own before pushing the big “panic” button and go running to tech support.
Apparently, I’m also in the minority of people that can actually check email, setup a new email account, use formulas in Excel, use styles in Word, and surf in multi-tabbed browsers. Each one of these skills I’ve learned either on my own, through decent documentation, or by the school of hard knocks. And yet, I use maybe 1-10% of each program’s true features.
Why is that?
The reason is that today’s software is so damn complicated.
Every program tries to win the feature war and be “everything to everyone.” It’s just ridiculous. Software is meant to help automate a process - usually a process that would suck without automation: word processing (remember the IBM Selectric?), spreadsheets (remember paper?), web browsing (remember going to the library and reading books?), email (remember licking envelopes and things called “stamps”?).
Do we need to go 8 dialogs deep to set up security settings? Is there a burning need to have a drop down menu of 9 different “Format” options for styles? Since when did creating a website require that we have 50,000 floating palettes of “helpful information at our fingertips.” I don’t have that many fingers, I’m getting old, and my eyes cross reading 8pt or trying to click one of 200 buttons that are 5 pixels by 5 pixels each. I mean, really!
I’m not saying that all software blows. There are very useful programs out there that are truly innovative and do what they say (like Servoy!) - but there are others that are just so difficult to use - that I’m convinced that no one has actually used the crap in “real life” before they got the bright idea to ship it.
Do engineers actually use the software they write? Do marketing pukes who put the “check mark” features on the box - actually USE the software and try to do the things they say it will do? Do salespeople actually use their own platform/software to try to get stuff done?
In 99.999% of cases - I’d say it’s a resounding “Hell NO!”
The engineers sit around thinking up “great ideas” utilizing the latest technologies but then they implement it in such a way that only engineers can use it.
The marketing stooges read 5 web sites and 5 magazines and then run down to the engineers and say “Do we have (your buzz word here) in the new version??” Then they proceed to wine, bitch, moan and behave like 5 year olds until they get marketing copy on the box that is a laundry list of de jour “must have” features. The only problem is - that in 95% of the cases the reality doesn’t live up to the hype. Either the feature is too hard to understand, or called with such arcane commands or buried 7 dialogs deep - that it’s impossible for the user to actually use the feature.
The sales folks (in most cases) wouldn’t ever actually use the software they’re selling. They really don’t know anything about the software except what Larry, Schemp and Moe have lead them to believe the software will do. Whether or not the software actually DOES a particular thing - doesn’t really matter

- EXCEPT to the person buying it.
Before I get too much hate mail, let me say that I realize that a lot of computer users are “documentationally challenged”, often can’t chew gum and walk at the same time, and if a single click doesn’t work - will try to click 150,000 times - just to be sure (you know who you are).
Look, the bottom line is - software should correctly solve a real problem. And it should work. And it should be appropriate for the targed user. If you’re selling software for novices - but don’t want to piss off “power” users - have a “dumbass mode” so people just starting out can make it work. On the other hand, if you have a tool that is meant for developers - don’t “dumb it down” for the occasional novice user. Developers want developer-grade software.
And no matter what - software should just work.

Thought For Today: May God grant me the grace to practice what I preach…

God, I’m getting old.
At dinner the other night somehow the discussion turned to technology - or, specifically - the lack of technology when my wife and I were growing up.
As I sat there an recited a list of all the things that weren’t invented when I was a kid - computers, video camera, “digital” anything, microwaves, VCR (forget about DVDs), fax machines, cell phones, pagers, PDA’s, video games (well, OK, “Pong” came out when I was 10), cable television, copiers, printers, ATMs, phone machines, super glue, voicemail, coffee makers…
“…and did you have stone dishes and cook over a fire, Daddy?” (true question from my 6 year old daughter)
Well, I’m not THAT old. Don’t get me wrong we had our “cool” technology of the time: 8 track tapes, CB radios, Super 8 movie cameras, IBM Selectric typewriters (VERY advanced “business machines”), fondue machines, Tupperware, Tang, 3 TV stations (with a 25 foot antenna on the roof), Christmas lights with individual “screw-in” bulbs…
Even without the technological advances of today, people still managed to get stuff done.
We would use carbon paper pressed against a second piece of paper when we typed up a letter so we would have a copy. We did things like write and letter, put a stamp on it, and {gasp!) MAIL it. We went into a bank branch to make a deposit or withdrawl, transfer money, or do anything else with money. You would call people on the phone if you wanted to “instantly” communicate with them - or better yet - just drop by their house or office.
We would play with “boring” toys like blocks, Lincoln Logs, Erector Sets. We would play games like Monopoly, Chutes and Ladders and Candyland. When a new Disney movie came out either we would go to the drive-in as a family or see it in the theatres. Once. Ever.
Then, things got “faster.” We had one hour photo developing, a “fax” machine - for “instant” communications (at 600 baud!), “instant” soup, “instant” copies.
Fast forward to today.
We have “instant” messaging, “email” (instant” communications), Blackberrys (when email is just too slow), every Disney movie made on VHS and DVD (and probably even Beta!) for the “instant” Disney experience, satellite TV and radio with 200+ stations (to “instantly” suck up all your free time and rot your brain), TiVO (will “instantly” record 2 shows at once), iPods (”instant” music anywhere), cell phones (”instant” communication), PDF documents rather than faxes (”instant” archives), 1GB USB hard drives (”instant” storage), “lunchables” (”instant” kid lunches), two way walkie talkies built into phones (when dialing is not “instant” enough), broadband (”instant” downloads when compared to dial-up)…

We place 5 million cell phone calls, send over 10 BILLION instant messages and 3 million SMS messages PER DAY. With all this technology that lets us “instantly” connect and get our work done, and with all the other “instant” technologies we have today - we should have a 3 hour work week.
But, of course, we don’t.
We now work (on average) more than 40 hours per week, take less vacations, and when we DO take a vacation - we tend to pack the Blackberry, cell phone, laptop and iPod and look for hotels that sport free wireless Internet connections.
We’re turning into a society that has ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). And yet, we’re still dreaming of a time when things are MORE “instant.” We want things to go faster, take less time and effort so we can… ummmm… well, spend even MORE time working, and less time interacting with our friends, families, churches, organizations and clubs.
I don’t know about you - but I’m still waiting for the “instant” meal pills, flying cars that fold into a briefcase (”instant” transportation) - or at the least my own rocket pack. I want an “instant” dog walker attached to my house floating in the sky, a personal robot to “instantly” cater to my every whim, a computer that recoginizes speech and can anticipate my needs… Ok, so I watched too many “Jetsons” growing up - but I still want them.
If ONLY I had those things… THEN I would take time to smell the roses. THEN I could find the time to attend my kids’ games. THEN I could donate my time to others. THEN I could _____________ (fill in the blank).
Technology has come a long way since I was a kid. I marvel at what humankind has been able to accomplish in such a short time. I wonder what the future will hold. I wonder what it will be like when my kids are my age.
Now if only I had an “instant” time travel machine…